Conversations about where we’re at

and how we move forward.

By Amy Gallo, Cohost of Women at Work and Contributing Editor at HBR

Some fun news from the podcast team! After 10 seasons, we’re changing things up and shifting to a new, year-round schedule. That means we’ll be releasing a new episode every other Monday.

Our first in this new cadence dropped this week: “Getting Along with an Insecure Tormentor.” This is part of the series we started back in 2022 when my book Getting Along first came out. In each of these episodes, I help a listener who’s struggling with a difficult coworker—in this case, our listener is dealing with a boss who has turned on her.

In addition to new “Getting Along” episodes, we’ll be continuing several of our special series, including “The Essentials,” Amy B’s “How to Manage,” and “Ask the Amys.” We’ve also got episodes in the works on self-disclosure, managing up, asking purposeful questions, and more.

While our team adjusts to this new “always-on” schedule, I’ve realized that I’ll miss the pause between seasons. It was always a time to catch our breath, bounce around episode ideas, and explore new topics for the coming season. Of course, our team is already finding new ways to build in time for those activities, but it has me thinking about how much of our work is always-on and when, if ever, we find the space and time to pause.

I was struck by some stats from a recent article, “How to Give Yourself More Space to Think,” by researchers Megan Reitz and John Higgins: “39% of over 1,500 global, cross-sector, mid, and senior managers say they are unable to pause during the day to reflect on how to plan and prioritize, 59% describe meetings as ‘rushed,’ 37% describe them as ‘distracted,’ and 29% feel unable to take the time needed to consider and respond to what others say.” This level of cognitive load and the impact it has on our work and wellbeing doesn’t seem sustainable to me.

I don’t want to manage my time, energy, and attention like it’s a python I need to wrestle to the ground everyday (which is increasingly how I’ve been feeling with the relentless, overwhelming news cycle). I want to have space to reflect, think, and connect with myself and others. This spaciousness, as Reitz and Higgins say, allows us to “widen our view, engage with curiosity, encounter what is not readily measurable or predictable, and notice and enjoy interdependencies and relationships.” Who doesn’t want those things?

One thing I’ve taken away from Reitz and Higgins’s article and their ongoing research into spaciousness is that it’s not just about time but also about energy and attention. So you don’t need to clear your calendar or put a project on hold; you can find smaller moments of spaciousness. As you may have inferred, I have more questions about how to do this than I have answers, but I’m hoping it’s something we can explore in future episodes.

How You Can Contribute to the Show

As always, we’re looking for your input on the episodes we’re developing. Feel free to email us about any of the topics below at womenatwork@hbr.org.

Are you looking for advice on a workplace issue you don’t know how to solve? We’re working on more “Ask the Amys” episodes, where Amy B and I answer audience questions about topics like leading teams, dealing with conflict and difficult people, making decisions, managing stress and uncertainty, negotiating, and communicating. Do you have a workplace issue you’d like us to weigh in on? Email us your question, and we’re happy to keep your question anonymous if you’d like.

What’s allowed you to make important career moves? In a recent article titled “How Women Can Win in the Workplace,” three McKinsey consultants argue that women need to build more experience capital—“the knowledge, skills, and wisdom gained on the job”—if they’re going to achieve parity with men in the workforce. Is this something you’ve done to push your career forward, perhaps by strategically changing companies or industries, enrolling in development programs, pushing for P&L responsibility, or becoming an AI power user? We’d love to hear how this has worked for you and what obstacles you might have faced. Have you sought out a company with a strong learning culture, only to find that training and mobility are more of a talking point than reality? Are you trying to take on stretch assignments or leadership roles, but your boss is holding you back? Or did your strategic planning take you exactly where you wanted to go? Get in touch and let us know how building experience capital (or trying to) is playing out for you.

Are you avoiding AI? A Harvard Business School professor found in his research that women are adopting AI tools at a 25% lower rate than men. This gap seems to be connected to women’s concerns about whether using the tools is ethical and whether they’ll be judged harshly for relying on them to do their work. We want to continue exploring this gender gap in AI adoption on the show and would love to hear from you if you’ve been hesitant to use AI and, if so, what’s holding you back.

What questions do you have about managing up? We’re working on an episode about managing the critical relationship with your boss. I’ll be interviewing executive coach and author Melody Wilding, who has a new book out on the topic, and we want to include your questions and concerns in the conversation. Is there a specific scenario you need help with? Maybe you’re struggling to get your boss to advocate for your career, aren’t sure how to decode their priorities, or don’t know how to set a boundary with them. Let us know what’s on your mind.

From the Podcast

Getting Along with an Insecure Tormentor. In our most recent podcast episode, I talk with Maria, who isn’t sure she can salvage her relationship with her boss. He used to be someone she admired, learned from, and enjoyed working with, but since he got demoted, he has become critical and dismissive, questioning her commitment to work and starting to undermine her instead of lifting her up. Maria and I discuss what steps she can take to manage his insecurity while also protecting her wellbeing and career. This episode is for anyone who has worked with a boss who’s turned against them.

Thanks for reading, listening, and contributing—

Amy G

The Women at Work newsletter is edited by Amanda Kersey, Erica Truxler, and Holly Bauer.

If you’re interested in sponsoring this newsletter, Women at Work’s podcast, or a future event, get in touch with our colleagues in sales: newslettersales@harvardbusiness.org.

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