Not all feedback is direct. Repeated questions, increased oversight, or sudden disengagement can signal someone’s hidden concerns. When you notice these cues, it’s time to get curious. Ask yourself what might be left unsaid—and why—and use these three techniques to tactfully prod for more information.
Make it safe for others to tell you the truth. People, especially direct reports, often hesitate to share honest feedback unless they feel it’s safe to do so. Normalize the process by tying it to your growth: “I’m working to improve—what am I missing?” If direct feedback doesn’t come, reframe your ask as a request for advice or observations. Lowering the stakes can open the door to more useful insights.
Listen to learn. Once someone begins to share, don’t assume the first comment is the full story. Let silence work, follow up with genuine curiosity, and confirm what you heard. Reflecting their message back to them builds trust and clarity.
Reward the risk they took. Appreciation matters. Even if the feedback is tough to hear, thank the person for their honesty. Share what you plan to do with the input and check back in later. This follow up encourages continued candor and strengthens the relationship. |
