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Free Guide: Dating, Solved

If you’ve ever stared at your phone wondering why they didn’t text back, replayed a date in your head trying to decode what it meant, or hesitated to say how you felt because you didn’t want to screw things up—this is for you.

Dating feels confusing when no one ever explains how attraction actually works. Signals, effort, and reciprocity follow patterns of pretty predictable human behavior. Most people just never learn how to spot them. But you can.

Because I dedicated an entire Solved podcast episode to dating, and created this 63-page PDF companion guide for you. Dating, Solved breaks down modern dating dynamics so you can spot unstable patterns early, read interest more clearly, and make better decisions without turning dating into a performance or a guessing game. If you’re really looking for the one relationship that changes the rest, this is the no-bullsh*t guide you need to build it.

And it’s yours, free, with one click.

​Download Your Free Dating Guide​

LAST WEEK'S BREAKTHROUGHS

In last week’s newsletter, I asked you to reframe one struggle you have as training, not punishment.

Michelle discovered that her struggles are, in fact, the dreams of her past self:

“I just signed up for your newsletter this weekend. Today's was the first one I read and it felt fortuitous.

I am a single mother to two ADHD children—9 and 13. I work full-time, run the household, and try to support them in their growth. Some days are really hard. I go through cycles with my outlook on life. Sometimes I am in a good place where I can be motivated to continue creating structure for my kids, take care of myself, and be hopeful about the future. Sometimes I get stuck in the quicksand of negativity and I am resentful that my life is so hard and my kids don't function at their age levels. I compare myself to others. I get burnt out and overwhelmed. I feel alone and think things will never get better.

Your suggestion today that the things I am struggling with now are a result of what I dreamed in the past was a good reminder to change my perspective. I dreamed of having children. I dreamed of escaping my ex-husband. I dreamed of owning my own house. And now I have all those things, but some days all of that can look like a burden instead of a blessing. So I am going to start trying to reframe my experience and think about where we have come from. My kids have made a lot of progress over the last six months but sometimes it's easy to forget that and only see the problems.

I loved your books and I look forward to using these newsletters to continue to improve my life. Thank you.”

While K realized her current struggle is not one she wants to pursue:

“This email really struck me because I have worked towards many different goals in my life, probably believing I should have been achieving them rather than actually wanting to. I sit here in the midst of VAT return chaos all because I forced myself to become a bookkeeper—I thought it would bring me a stable income and a happier life. What I came to realize, is I wish I had stuck to my old simple job of cleaning. I didn't take the work home with me, unlike this job (literally and mentally!).

I took a holiday recently and decided that I can't go on being this miserable. Yes, I achieved my goal, which is why I am sitting here. But not as a result of dreams, more aptly, I would call my nightmares. I am going to get through the next few months and start making plans to close down my practice and start learning about things I'm actually interested in. (I gained a philosophy and psychology degree and never used it, so I think I will go down this path again one way or another).”

Finally, Alex is using both the courses inside our Solved Membership and my Purpose app to train himself on boundaries:

“Solved community members know I’m focusing on my Autonomy goal, especially around navigating remote versus on-site work, a recurring theme in my Boundaries Month posts.

I’m currently on a work break, so I haven’t implemented this professional boundary yet. Still, the Boundaries Month exercises and my role-playing with the Purpose AI chatbot have strengthened my confidence to express boundaries collaboratively, increasing the likelihood of cooperative responses when I return.

In the Purpose role-plays, the app acts as my boss, gradually raising the difficulty to help me handle emotions like guilt, anxiety, and fear of professional consequences. My strategy is staying grounded in my values, knowing my core principles, and remaining calm and professional, which helps me stay centered and avoid over-explaining.

What surprised me most is how quickly this composure disarms difficult scenarios. It's hard for any counterpart, real or simulated, to stay reactive when I remain steady and reasonable.

I now feel prepared to bring this grounded confidence into real workplace conversations. Thank you, Boundaries Month and Purpose AI.”

If you’d like the kind of guidance, support, and results Alex is getting, you can check out our Solved Membership here, and while you’re at it, why not start your 7-day free trial of Purpose? Start your free trial here.

As always, send your breakthroughs by simply replying to this email. Let me know if you’d prefer to remain anonymous.

Until next week,

Mark Manson

#1 New York Times Bestselling Author
My Website – My Books – My YouTube Channel – My Podcast – My Community