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I am writing this on July 2. Yesterday, July 1, I officially purchased and took back over Stodzy Internet Marketing.
It feels really fucking good to have my company back.
Today, I’m going to tell you the entire story.
LFG. 🔥
How I Had My Mental And Emotional Breakdown
About two and a half years ago, I had a bit of a breakdown. At the time, my son was 3 and my daughter was still an infant. I was feeling an immense amount of pressure with Stodzy, managing my family, and dealing with my business partners.
On top of that, ghosts and traumas from my past were catching up to me. Outside of getting sober, it was the most difficult period of my life. You can only run from yourself for so long. Around this time, things started catching up with me.
I felt like I was going to explode.
One day, I was trying to eat breakfast and my son threw a little plastic spoon at me. It hit me right in the face and it made me so angry. I flung the spoon back at him and it hit him in the chest. It wasn’t a hard throw, it was just a little finger flick, but seeing the way he got scared of me absolutely broke my heart.
That exact moment was one of the lowest points of my life. My whole body filled with shame and guilt. It still haunts me.
I knew in my heart I wasn’t trying to hurt him. But I also knew that he was just a little boy and I’m a grown man. I’m the one responsible for my emotional stability, and in that moment, I had collapsed.
Right then, I made the decision to leave Stodzy. The original plan was for me to buy my partners out, but they wanted to buy me out instead.
I agreed, and we parted ways.
What Happened Next
Well, I was lost. I meandered around, trying to figure out who I was and the kind of person I wanted to be moving forward.
Confronting myself in the way I needed to was very hard, but in a weird way, it was also very liberating.
The last two years have been an incredible experience because I got to experiment with my life and rediscover who I am. I learned what I like, what I don’t like, and everything in between.
Speaking from a strictly professional standpoint, here’s the quick timeline of what went down:
Machine Method: I thought building a product attached to my personal brand would give me purpose. It was a good experience and made about $180k in a few months, but I learned that I hate running membership sites and B2C. Ultimately, I rolled Machine Method into Copyblogger Academy.
Quantum Leads: I wanted to try building an agency completely outside of the healthcare space. We scaled to $1M plus in about 9 months, which was a massive success. But it also taught me just how valuable it is to have an established team, deep networks, and built in SOPs. Starting from zero was way harder than I remembered.
Partnering with Chase: Chase is probably the smartest person I’ve ever met. We created The Shop AI and Directorly. One of the best things to come out of this entire period is my friendship with him. He’s so cool and I love the fact that we can meet in person and hang out.
Venture BHM: Through a serendipitous series of events, I met the team building Venture and came on board to manage their digital marketing and help scale the company. I’ve done these types of partnership deals twice before and had made some mistakes. This time, I’m bringing a career’s worth of lessons to the table to do something incredible.
I won’t lie, this whole phase has been deeply uncomfortable. When I got sober years ago, I think I made an unconscious decision to always be in control. Because I spent so much of my youth living in chaos and destruction, I built an adult world where everything was predictable. It kept me safe, it kept me from hurting people, and it kept me out of jail.
But looking back, I can see that control was often just a mechanism to cope with fear. Waking up every day for two years not knowing what was going to happen was stressful as hell. But it forced me to grow, and I’m grateful for it.
The Breathwork Session That Changed Everything
As some of you know, my wife is a breathwork instructor, and she has been absolutely selling out events here in Denver. About two months ago, I attended one of her sessions, and it sparked a massive shift in me.
During the session, a single phrase started looping in my head over and over again like a mantra:
“It’s my fucking company.”
“It’s my fucking company.”
“It’s my fucking company.”
Breathwork is so powerful, and my wife’s events have always given me the downloads that I needed. The fact that this download was so powerful, I knew I had to take it seriously.
In that moment, I realized I had been lying to myself. I had spent two years telling myself “it’s not a big deal,” or “it’s just a business,” or “who cares if it still has your name on it?”
Building a business is deeply emotional. I spent 12 years building Stodzy, the team, the brand, the reputation, and a life centered around serving our clients. Then, one day, I just walked away from it.
When I finally got honest with myself, I realized how much I missed Stodzy. I missed being Stodzy! That’s me. It’s literally my name.
After that session, I put my intentions out into the ether. I decided I was getting my company back. Then, everything moved fast.
How It All Went Down
Truthfully, it was incredibly seamless.
I hadn’t spoken to my old partners at all during the hiatus, but when I reached out, we picked up right where we left off. It felt like the universe was conspiring behind the scenes, because they had also been feeling a misalignment with the company while I was gone.
I made an offer. They accepted. Within a week, we had an agreement. I’m not sure if our relationships will ever be exactly what they used to be, but it was great to connect with them again.
There’s a natural ebb and flow to life; we all needed a break from each other, and everyone is walking their own path now. That makes me happy.
Moving Forward: The Future of Stodzy
First of all, it feels amazing to have my team back. Rebuilding systems from scratch at Quantum made me realize just how elite the Stodzy framework is.
Structurally, Stodzy is absorbing Quantum Leads. Quantum will act as the parent brand housing Stodzy, The Shop, and Digital Commerce (mostly because my entire life is tied to my quantumleads.com email and I’m not changing it now).
The company has the perfect leadership, the best talent, an undeniable brand, and incredible marketing. It feels like a closed circle. Everything is back exactly where it belongs.
I didn’t expect this process to be so emotional. When the deal was closing, it just felt like moving puzzle pieces back into place. But now that it’s official, and I am “Stodzy” again.
My operations are locked down, I have a 10 out of 10 CEO running the show, I have the team I spent years training back by my side, and most importantly... I have my name back.
Stodzy belongs to me. No one else. It’s mine.
Fuck yeah.
Love you guys. Talk to you tomorrow.
Tim
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